Thursday, January 31, 2019

Sooth Saying


“I am a soothsayer, a sayer of sooths,” the man answered.
The long quail feather in his turban bobbed as he spoke, and Shona could not help but smile at his strangeness. His wide velvet sleeve flapped wildly as he swung his arms. He was dressed in true mystic fashion. His show had all the correct beat and contained all the appropriate flare and phantasm. He produced from one of his billowing sleeves a clear sphere and held it out for the audience to ogle. Rachel was immediately drawn in and began to snake closer through the crowd. Shona begrudgingly followed, pushing passed the enthralled masses. The mystic set the little crystal orb on a pillow atop a pedestal that he had pulled down from his cart. He waved his hands enthusiastically over it.
“This is an ancient tome, of the ancients. It holds great powers of past, present, and future. But only a select few are given the ability to tap into this power, like myself,” he held one hand up to the crowd and the other up to his temple. His eyes rolled as he waved his hand over the crowd. His hand stopped suddenly as Shona finally caught up to her daughter who was waving her hand wildly to be picked. “You, sweet lady, the great divine has spoken to me and said you too have this great power.”
He held out his hand and Shona looked left and right trying to see whom he reached for, but it was her arm he grasped. He pulled her forward and she grabbed hold of her daughter before she lost sight of her. Paul pushed his way into the crowd in the space they vacated and looked questioningly as Shona was positioned in front of the sphere. She gave him a playful smile as she focused on what the fortune teller was saying.
“All you have to do is place your hand upon the crystal ball, and it shall open your third eye to the future,” he opened her hand so the palm was flat and hovered near the top of the orb, “When you are ready.”
He took several steps back. Rachel stood close to her mother’s shoulder trying to see. Shona let her hand hover a little longer. There was a pulsing coming from the orb. It was like a heartbeat coming from deep within. The sensation intrigued her. Shona flexed her fingers and took a breath before forcing her hand down onto the spherical rock. The shock was instant, like a great burst of wind from every direction at once. Then there was complete stillness like she was floating. Swirling around her was only darkness except for a far off pinpoint of light, like she was look up from the bottom of a well. She willed herself towards the light and it grew into an endless tunnel, the light always just out of reach. Shona floated ever towards its end, searching for something she could not name.
While Shona transcended within, the world outside had erupted into chaos. The instant her hand had touched the stone it had blackened and a great burst of wind had pushed outward, forcing Rachel to the ground. The pupils of her mother's eyes swelled making them appear completely black. Shona stood stark straight and her hair hung suspended in the air as if floating in a pond. Paul leapt to her side, but the fortune teller halted him before he could reach his lover.
“Do not touch her,” the soothsayer warned.
“Why, what will happen if I do?” Paul asked taking a step back. Rachel looked to her father in horror. Her brothers came to her side watching their mother cautiously. The twins stayed back in the crowd that was quickly dispersing in terror. They were too struck to move.
“If you touch her, she might come out of it. Do you have any idea how long I’ve been looking for a real soothsayer?” the mystic pulled off his robe and turban creeping close to Shona’s rigid form.
“I thought you were a soothsayer?” Rachel asked looking into her mother’s ghostly face.
“Of course not,” he chided, “I was starting to think they had all been wiped out. The fourth age was not kind to those with the gift.”
The crowd had all but disappeared at this point, and all that remain were of the family. They all drew together watching. Paul stood close behind the fraudulent fortuneteller as he waved his hands in front of the entranced woman’s face.
“What gift?” he asked the mountebank.
“She has the sight,” he replied drawing his pointer finger from his forehead to point out into space, “Go ahead ask her anything.”
Paul stepped forward holding his hands out to either side of his lover. He held the air around her, careful to avoid the pieces of hair that swirled dangerously around her like a demonic sail.
“Shona?” she did not react.
“Try, Seeker,” the peddler prompted.
Paul resettled his focus, “Seeker?”

“ASK,” boomed an unnatural voice from Shona’s mouth.

Sunday, January 27, 2019

Hidden World

 Amber stopped as she made her way to a table from the lunch counter. She wasn't sure she had seen what she thought she saw. She took a couple steps in reverse to look back through the doorway to the other dinning room. No, she was seeing it. Standing at a high top was a man with the ass of a horse stuck to his back. People didn't seem to notice. The walked around the protruding back end stuck out into the walkway, but somehow everyone seemed to be avoiding the rear without looking directly at the strange anatomy. It was like the swishing horse tail wasn't there. She just stood staring for a while watching the strange change in communal motion to accommodate a horse butt that no one else apparently saw. Amber didn't move until one of the other people at the high top starting staring back at her. He had tiny little curly cue horns on his forehead. She didn't mean to let her mouth drop open, but it was hard to control at that point. How was it possible that everyone didn't see this?

 Maybe she should have gone to her table, but she turned on her heel and made her way to the strand assembly at the table. They pointedly avoided looking at her as she approached. When she got close enough she had to work hard on her control to keep from reaching out and touching the horse rump, but if it was real that would probably be rude.

 "Hi," she said to the back of the horseman's head, since everyone at the table refused to recognize her, "I realize this is going to sound crazy, and I would not be offended if you just told me that I'm a maniac, because I would totally get that, but are you a centaur?"

 She smiled brightly, and as non-threateningly as she could as the Centaur turned around to look at her with wide eyes. "Excuse me?"

Amber tried to laugh in a way she really hoped didn't make her sound even crazier than she felt. "It's the funniest thing. I was just walking past on my way to lunch when I looked over and notices you over here with a..." she waved at the large horse anterior that whipped it's tail back and forth. "Please tell me that I have lost my mind." Once she started looking at it, she couldn't look away. It was like watching a car crash. One of the big horse feet stamped and startled her. She looked at the other two men at the table. "Then I came over her and noticed that that gentleman was a faun, and this guy is... I'm not really sure what he is, but he is very interesting looking."

 The third man blinked sideways eyelids at her as the faun pulled a hat out of his coat pocket and pulled it over the little horn on his head. The centaur turned to her and looked her up and down. His ears were pointy, that was... unusual.

 "He's a Kappa," the horseman said pointing to the strange creature that stood across the small table. "I think he's mostly turtle."

 Her shoulders slumped as she looked around the table. "I'm not crazy."

 "You sound disappointed?"

 "If I were crazy, I could have talked myself out of what I saw. I might even forget it eventually. But now..." she waved her hand vaguely at the Kappa turtle man, "I'm not forgetting that."

 "His name is Tyler, he's from Hong Kong," the centaur scoffes.

 Amber put her elbows on the table and cradled her head in her hands. "Of course he is. It's suddenly really hot in here or is it just me?"

 Well, things could be worse. This could have all been in her head and slowly worn away at her brain until she was in a state of crippled neurosis. Now she knew it was real and she could just move on with her life. She could move on with her life knowing that there were really centaurs and fauns and kappas, what ever the Hell that was. She stood up straight and took a few deep soothing breaths. The air carried the twang of hot, sweaty horse fur. That was not helpful. Neither was the clip-clopping of giant centaur hooves. She pushed away from the table and spun around. She was going back to her table. Then she was going to sit down and eat her lunch. And if she remain sane through that she would go back to work and finish her spread sheet. When she got home she would drink enough to think this whole day was a bad dream.

Tuesday, January 22, 2019

Review: Cerulean Sins (Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter, #11)

Cerulean Sins (Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter, #11) Cerulean Sins (Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter, #11) by Laurell K. Hamilton
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

Would have been better if the entire vampire politics aspect would have been cut out. If the book had been exclusively about Anita attempting to take out terrorists bent on using her necromancy powers for nefarious ends the book would have been so much better. But instead we got another slog through neck deep vampire politics that Anita is too obtuse to understand. I wish thing were the way they were in the old days, when things were simple. You raised zombies, killed vampires, fought monsters both human and supernatural. Now I we have to put up with chapter after chapter of pointless political posturing, because we all know you're going to shoot your way out of it and render any attempt at social subterfuge moot.

Why you no cool anymore, Anita?

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Friday, January 11, 2019

Review: The Nest

The Nest The Nest by Cynthia D'Aprix Sweeney
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

This is a book about terrible people doing terrible things to equally terrible people. I realize that it is about how money corrupts people and that the only way to truly be happy is to find joy in the things that money can't buy, but it felt so terribly vapid the entire time. None of the characters are particularly likable, even after several of them have their important realizations. They go from being potentially rich and awful, to marginally middle class and still terrible, but like... normal terrible. I didn't like any of them but the baby.

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Monday, January 7, 2019

Review: The Violent Century

The Violent Century The Violent Century by Lavie Tidhar
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

It really does feel like what I imagine a comic book would be like if it were written instead of drawn. The story takes an interesting Third person approach. The narrator does not give a lot of insight into the characters, but rather leaves it up to the interpretation of the reader, much like someone viewing the panes of a comic book would. I think I would have like the whole story better if it didn't keep referencing the fact that it was referencing comic book structure. The story itself is interesting enough, though the quick cuts back and forth through time are a little disorienting. There were several characters that were introduced that I believe we were supposed to have a strong, but unearned, sentimental attachment to just because they had once been previously mention a hundred pages ago. The slow reveal used through the use of random flash back became more wearisome than entertaining by the end. Honestly, parts of the story it felt like the author had completely forgotten about certain character until that point and then decided, 'hey, maybe I should have them do something?' The whole thing was entertaining enough, but I wish the style had been attempted with a tighter story.

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