Immortal Divorce and Other Hurdles

This is a bad idea. Rudy doesn’t get it. I’m putting everyone in danger by going with them. Rudy looks at me in the rear view. His eyes are wild, and he looks back to the road so quickly that I wonder if he was actually looking at me for a moment. Then his eyes are back. 

“What do you think this is about?” he asks, his fingers undulating over the steering wheel.  I meet his eyes for a split second in the mirror before he looks back to the road. 

“The tithe,” I answer matter of factly. The very word makes everyone writhe uncomfortably. These sort of things are always about the tithe. Well, they always say it's about the tithe, but it's really about setting an example. Rudy and the coven don't need to know that. This is going to be difficult enough without knowing that not everyone is getting out alive. It's probably the hospital. The Council Chairs never like it when the peons work so close to the humans, but it's not like Rudy is some fledgling revenant, he's been a vampire for more than 600 years. Here's not a problem. Maybe they don't like that he works at the free clinic. He's a charitable soul, they know that, they've known that for 600 years. Maybe someone recognized me. Maybe it's all my fault.

"I shouldn't have come," I say looking out the window. If I’d known the council was in town I would have left, but they snuck up on everyone. You wouldn't think that vampires as old as those on the council could go anywhere in secret, but I guess they've had plenty of practice. 

"You were seen with us," Rudy says his knuckles whitening as he squeezes the wheel. "The Chairs would ask questions if you aren't with us." 

They're going to do a lot worse if any of them recognize me. I look at Carla and Steven sitting next to me. Their hands are woven together in a big knot. This will be their first time in front of the council. She hasn't even been a vampire a year yet. They'll probably kill her first. Maybe that will be enough to spare everyone else. Steven won't stand for it of course, but Rudy will hopefully be able to talk him down. Susan up in the passenger seat watches out the window as the hotel comes into view. It's the Holiday Inn. Cheap bastards are going to slaughter us in a budget hotel. Susan looks over her shoulder at me and I try a reassuring smile. Her expression stays blank. She knows it's bad. Can't kid a kidder. I look back at the hotel.

"Who owns this one?" I ask as we pull into the parking lot.

"Avery," Susan says. "Apparently he has a buffet set up for the Chairs."

I shudder, "Of course he does." Avery is a bit twisted. It's always kids. I try not to think too much about it. There's nothing we can do about it now. We all fall out of the car and make our way to the lobby. At the front desk Rudy gets our instructions. I keep my head down. There are eight vampires in the lobby. They're dressed like kids, if I didn't know better I'd think they were a baseball team traveling for a tournament, but they are watching us even as they toss a ball back and forth between them. They aren't local, which means they're council muscle. My coven stands apart from them as much as possible. I try to obscure myself in their midst. I don't recognize the baseball goons, but that doesn't mean they won't recognize me. Rudy shuffles us around the corner to one of the executive ballrooms. There's a vampire sitting at the door reading a newspaper, and he knocks as we approach. A vampire inside the room opens the door and ushers us in. I keep my head so low my chin is practically digging into my sternum. We're poised in the center of the dimly lit room. I can feel the tables around us, twelve of them. The Council Chairs sit in front of us, and if I can just keep my head down we all might make it out of here in one piece. Rudy is a good negotiator. 

I wonder what Todd is doing right now. Probably just sitting down to watch the game, beer in hand. He's probably left a message on my phone by now asking if I'm busy. It's my week to get the pizza. He'll be worried that I didn't answer. He'll probably call again later. I might still be alive to answer. I hope so. I'd hate to let Todd down. After all this time, he’s the only person I care if I disappoint. If I can do one thing right tonight, it will be to make sure that none of this comes back to him. 

“Look at this motley band,” the vampire directly in front of us laughs. Julian. Damn. I try to hide a little more, without making it obvious. I didn’t think he would bother coming out himself. The High Chairs so rarely travelled to this part of the world. A man grunts back at him and the hair on the back of my neck stands straight up. Darius. Double damn. I fight the urge to look. I have to keep my head down, he can’t see me, lives depend on him not seeing me. Julian continues, “I’m sure you’re wondering why you are here?”

Rudy steps forward, “Yes, Sirs.”

Maybe I can just peek up. When was the last time I saw Darius, Budapest maybe? That was barely a glimpse. He wouldn't have changed at all. He'll always be the same, that's what it means to be immortal. If I look up it will just endanger everyone. I have to fight the urge. Self control, that's what I've been doing all these years, I just need a few more minutes. I can do this. 

"There have been a number of troubling charges brought against your coven," Julian says. "Fraternizing with humans."

"Sir, I'm a doctor," Rudy says, "My patients are human. I have to interact with them to treat them." 

"We understand that a great deal of time was taken turning your newest member." Darius says, and I have to clench my chin to my chest to fight the urge to peer up at him. The sound of his voice is like a siren's song. "Lengthy courtships are dangerous in this day and age. Information gets away from us too quickly."

That hardly seems fair, especially coming from him. He used to say that courtship was a dance. And oh my, did he ever dance well. If I could just look up at his face, I would know what he really thinks. No, look down, just like Le Miserable. I can do this.

"And it seems that you've failed to increase you tithe to match the size of your new congregation," Julian continued. It always comes back around to the tithe. The only inevitable thing in the world when you're immortal, taxes. 

"Lord Julian," Rudy begins, "we're not a coven in the traditional sense. We do not produce in the same way that other houses do. We're not a business, we're a family. This is my wife, my son, my daughter-in-law, my sister." Don't draw attention to me Rudy. I try to make myself smaller. It's sweet that he calls me his sister, but it might be better to call me out of sight, out of mind. 

"While that is a sweet sentiment, it is not an opinion shared by this council," Julian responds. I flick my eyes ever so careful up to try and glimpse the High Chair, but he's just above my brow line. Damn. "Your tithe must be paid based on the current size of your house, or your house must shrink." 

Susan takes Rudy's hand, as Carla clings tighter to Steven, which leaves me unpaired, and exposed. I can't help letting my face peek up trying to see the scene. I only look up long enough to make sure no one is looking at me. They aren't. I sigh inwardly with relief.

"Sirs," Rudy says, "We can't pay anymore. We are already stretched to pay as it is."

I sense more than see the movement around us. They're going to execute us. They're not going to wait for judgement. Reflexively I reach over and wrap my arms around Carla, trying feebly to protect her. She doesn't deserve this. She hasn't been a vampire long enough to deserve this yet. 

"I see there is a far greater infraction we need to deal with," Darius says. I press my face into Carla's hair trying to pull her into me as much as I can. She looks terrified sandwiched between me and Steven. "I know that creature there to be a werewolf."

I look up and Darius is looking straight at me. All movement in the room has ceased. He looks the same. Not a day has gone by for him in almost 3000 years. I don't know why that continues to shock me. I haven't changed either, not physically at least. 

"Hello husband," I say pushing the young shivering vampire behind me. Rudy turns wild eyes to me. I told him this was a bad idea, so I shrug at him. He should have listened.

"Ahh, Zephyra, what a pleasant surprise!" Julian says clapping his hands together.

I scowl at him, "Actually, it's Becky now." Only vampires cling doggedly to their human names. Personally, I change mine every 10 years out of force of habit whether I need to or not. Becky won't last me much longer, assuming I live passed today. Darius smiles and my eyes flick back to him, riveted by every move he makes. He's still beautiful. 

"This is what you've been doing all this time, taking in strays?" he says. I'm watching his lips so intently that I barely hear the words he's saying. I look at Rudy and Susan who are watching me fearfully. 

"Sort of stumbled into it, really." I can feel the cool spot where Carla is pressed between my shoulders. She's still shaking. Please, Darius, don't ask the question. Please, forgive me.

"It is against our laws to let werewolves live," Julian says. I don't look at him. I'm still holding my breath, waiting for Darius. His is the only opinion that matters. I am his. "This means that all of your lives are now forfeit."

"I submit myself to my husband's judgement," I say before vampires can react to the edict. "That is my right by the old laws."

Julian scowls at me, but then turns to Darius. We watch each other. His eyes rake over me as if trying to remember every inch that he once knew so well. I left, but it was for a good reason, and he knows it, he has to know it. Darius, please forgive me. 

"Wife," he says and I step towards him. 

"Husband," I say gripping the edge of the table he sits behind. "I'm sorry."

"For what?" He asks his eyes cool, "leaving me, or killing our children."

My breath catches in my throat. Is that what he's thought all this time? No wonder he's hated me. 

"That's not fair!" I cry, "What I did, I did so they would live. And Darius they lived. They grew into such strong, good men. They're lives had meaning. Then those lives ended as all mortal lives must end."

Our sons were great men. Founders of Nations. Leaders of men. How dare he suggest that such lives had no meaning just because they were mortal lives. 

"They could still be here," he says looking through me. 

"As what?" I ask, "As a vampire? As a werewolf? Would you really have wanted such a thing for someone you loved?" I certainly didn't. That's why I took them away. I took them where they would be safe from Julian's poison. Darius would never have chosen this life for our sons, but Julian would not have given him a choice. He would have found a way to manufacture the necessity to change them just like he did for Darius. Just like he did for me. I had to keep them safe. I can see in Darius eyes that he knows it to be true. Something has happened in our years apart that has helped him to see the monster the way I have. I kneel before him. 

"But they're gone now," he says finally meeting my eyes.

"No," I tell him, smiling. "They live even now. They live there," I say pointing to Rudy, "and there." Pointing to Carla. 

He looks at the vampires before him in a new light. They look back at me and I smile. Maybe I didn't quite stumble into these particular vampires. I didn't just pluck them up for no reason. They're my blood, I have to protect them. It's what I do best. It's all I've done for nearly 3000 years. 

"You can verify this I suppose?" Julian sneers. 

I look him right in the eye and bark, "Yes."

"Our blood seems destined for immortality," Darius says distractedly. "How many are of your ilk I wonder?"

Looking back at him I watch as his eyes grow cold. He thinks so poorly of me? "There have been four."

"But no longer?" He asks.

I stare through him. They hadn’t been my fault. But a werewolf’s life is often violent and short. The loss of control accompanied by unfathomable strength and hunger often makes them too dangerous to leave alive. I had no choice. That’s the reason this council has put a bounty on all of my kind’s heads. Other than the personal reasons, of course.  

“I’ve done a great number of terrible things in my long life," So many terrible things. Things that I still see in my nightmares, "but failing to steal our sons' mortality is perhaps the one thing that I've done right.” I look into my husband's eyes. I've hurt him. That may have been the worst thing I've done. It was cruel to steal his sons, to take his legacy out of his hands, but they were my legacy too. They were my blood, too.

I slide my hand across the table intending to take his hand and see a flicker of movement out of the corner of my eye. Turning toward the twitch I see her. Her long red hair bundled artfully on top of her head. She stares daggers at me. My fingers curl into a fist on the table. His new wife. I’ve spent my life living like a nun and he took a new wife in less than a century of our separation. Seeing her by his side in Verona had nearly killed me. Granted that was no reason to burn the Vampire Council House, but that was not exclusively my fault. It was more a matter of failing to stop the humans from doing so, but that's beside the point. I've spent the last 3000 years being faithful, and he chose not to do the same.

“I’ve been a faithful wife,” I say not breaking eye contact with the vile woman, “My vows bind me to you.” I look back into his steel grey eyes. If we’re going to finish this, it should be as we started it, together. Standing, I step back towards my coven. “But please don’t let your displeasure with me reflect on my family. They aren’t involved in this.”

Rudy puts his hand on my shoulder. I look at the floor and clasp my hands in front of me. There were so many times I could have put my happiness before my vows, but I didn’t. I was good. I watched our family. I respected my commitment. I didn’t let the animal win. I didn’t go mad. I didn’t sleep with Todd. Gods, I miss Todd. I wonder if he’s called yet? We were going to watch the game together. I don’t really care for football, but the bright colors and fast motion seem to be entertaining for Todd, so I endure it to spend time with him. When I need a ride, he’s always there to get me, usually in his cop car, but still a ride’s a ride. Because he invites me over I don’t have to eat alone or with a bunch of vampires awkwardly watching me. For the few hours a week that I get to see him, I get to be human. And all this time I’ve been living by these ancient vows, that my fucking husband hasn’t even been following. I’m not sure what makes me angrier, that I’ve wasted so much time being good, or that he has spent so much time not. But what did I expect? He’s a vampire. Their very nature is cruel and amoral. I feel so foolish. 

“I’ve decided,” he says. I raise my eyes to watch him. There’s a smile in the corners of his eyes that doesn’t meet his lips. “You no longer deserve to be my wife.”

His words hit me like a physical slap and I stagger back against Rudy’s hand. If he wasn’t there I think I might go all the way down. My heart is pulsing through my ears and I can’t hear. I have to clamp my hand over my mouth to hold in a cry. I thought he might feel this way, but to hear him say it hurts me. Everything he has done for the last three millennia has hurt me; becoming a vampire, putting a bounty on my head, marrying the vile woman, choosing the council over me, all of it. Yet, there’s always one more cut that can be made isn’t there? There’s always one more drop to be wrung. I didn’t realize how viceral my need for his approval was until I didn’t receive it. The wolf in me cries to the crescent moon and longs to break free. It would tear it’s way to the surface and then tear through this entire council chamber. The wolf doesn’t feel slighted, it just wants to feed its hunger. It hungers for vengeance, for freedom, for oblivion. I can feel the wolf’s eyes looking out. Feel how it hungers, and I struggle to hold it back. I am in control, not the animal. I have a mind for reasoning. I can wait until they start trying to kill us. Then I will let the beast run, and I will watch the world burn. 

“I release you from your vows,” Darius says. “But I retain the right to your life.”

I look up at my husband. He’s watching me, his eyes narrowing at the sight of my own. The wolf sees him as a weaker animal, and he can see that. Julian is scowling at his co-chair as if he is mad. “What?”

“No one will touch you except me,” Darius says, “I will decide when you die, dear wife, and I decide that is not today.”

Julian stands and slams his fist against the table. “No! This is madness. She is a werewolf, our enemy. She deserves to die.”

Darius cocks his head at me, “I think the crueler fate is to let her live. I find the thought of her living an unending life most satisfying. If I should have to then so should she.”

Julian’s fists are so tightly clenched that his knuckles go white. “Their coven is still too large.”

Darius turns his cool steel eyes to his sire. They stare at each other for a long time. Then, looking back at me Darius says, “She is not a vampire and thus is not subject to tithing, and if I am to believe my wife then those two are in fact my blood, and so their tithe is my responsibility. That leave two. So, In fact, they are overpaying currently.”

Julian looks ready to leap upon my steel eyed savior. The council room has become very loud suddenly. All the vampires in the room are shouting to be heard. My coven has closed in around me and we stand locked together as the room spins into chaos. Darius smirks at me and I bow my head to him. He returns the gesture and I pull my small family from the council chamber. No one stops us. The confusion is too great. There is no agreement as to whether we are still being punished and rather then wrongly act against us all the vampires have decided to take a stance of deliberate neglect. When we make it out of the room we run. We don’t even stop as the vampiric youths in the lobby jump up and call to us. We make it to the car and Rudy guns the engine spinning us out of the parking lot. After running three stop lights at about 40 over the speed limit Rudy determines that we might be safe. Carla and Steven are laughing and Susan has sunk so low in the front seat that I can only see her hair sticking up. I look at Rudy’s wild eyes in the mirror. He can’t believe we made it out. I can’t believe it either. I silently thank every God I can think of as we drive back home. Rudy takes Susan’s hand as we merge onto the highway and finally seems to settle a bit. 

“Am I really related to you?” he asks flicking his eyes to me in the mirror. I look at his reflection and smile.

“Yes,” I tell him and lift up my extended fingers to count, “You are my youngest son’s great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great grandson.”

“And me?” Carla says. Steven has her wrapped up in his arms and perched on his lap. She’s smiling. She smiles like her father. 

“You’re that plus a bucketful more greats, on your mother’s side.” She puts her hand over her mouth as she giggles. I pat her knee. “If you would like to see the paperwork I can get it for you. My records are thorough.”

“I believe you,” Rudy says laughing. “Why didn’t you tell me that one of the High Chairs was your ex?”

“He wasn’t my ex,” I say matter of factly. “And really back when we were married I was really more his property then his wife. It’s complicated.”

Rudy shakes his head as we exit the highway and weave through the neighborhood to our suburban ranch. As Rudy puts the car into park we all just sit trying not to think about how close to death we just came. Slowly Steven opens his door and lifts his wife from the car. She wraps her arms around his neck as he carries her into the house. I sigh as I watch them disappear into the dark. Susan squeezes her husband’s hand before slipping out of the car and slowly making her way to the door. 

Looking at me leaning back in my seat Rudy says, “I guess your divorce is final now, then?” 

I meet his eyes in the mirror, “What?”

“Darius released you from your vows,” he says, “Doesn’t that mean your a free woman?”

That’s right. He broke with me. I’m not married anymore. I slide forward in the seat. After all these years I’m free to do whatever, or whoever I want. I let that sink in. I throw myself out of the car. Running down the street I can’t hear what Rudy calls after me. Practically flying through the dark neighborhood I nearly run into three cars, jump eight fences, trip on a sprinkler hose, and scare a couple of fighting cats into a panic before I make it to the door I’m looking for. I throw myself into knocking. Todd opens his front door with the look of someone expecting the Spanish Inquisition. I don’t say anything, I don’t hesitate, I throw my arms around his neck and kiss him. He’s the first man I’ve kissed in three thousand years. His arms wrap around me as he pulls me into his chest and I push my fingers through his hair. When he comes up for air, before he can ask any questions I tell him, “My divorce is finalized.” His eyes get very wide for a moment. Then like a switch has gone on in his brain he pulls me through the door and slams it closed behind me.

The Woman at the Bar

The woman is just sitting at the bar. Her long slender fingers have been been caressing the drink for almost an hour and she hasn’t once tasted it. There isn’t even condensation on the glass anymore. All the time she watches the men coming and going from the bar, but not staring because someone would notice that. I slide my drink down the bar to sit next to her and she doesn’t look up. Everything about her is perfect. Her skin is so smooth it’s like she’s been carved from marble. Her honey blonde hair looks like spun gold. Her figure is voluptuous and bared to the world in her skin tight black mini dress. I believe the modern slang is she’s a snack.

“Are you a vampire?” I ask. Her head whips up so fast that her hair circles all the way around to slap not only her, but also the person sitting behind her. They take a step away. 

“Excuse me?” she says in her beautiful melodic voice. She slides her drink between us like it’s a talisman against evil.  

“Are you a vampire?” I ask again, then elaborate when she continues to look shocked, “You’ve been sitting her by yourself for over an hour and haven’t taken a single drink that whole time.”

She seems to sooth and smiles warmly at me, “I like to watch people.” She takes a sip from her now, warm cocktail, and dribbles it back into the glass out the side of her mouth. “Oh God, that it awful. What in the Hell did I order?” 

She slides the glass across the bar as she scowls at it like it has personally offended her. Snapping her tongue several times she turns back to me, as if remembering that someone is in fact sitting next to her. I point behind the bar and she turns to look. “Also, you have no reflection.”

She cocks her head at the shelves of liquor behind the bar. I wave at my reflection behind the bottles and point to her noticeable absence next to me. She waves at the bottles to no effect on the mirror. Her head nods as she turns back to me.

“Good catch,” she says looking me up and down, “So you got me, what now?”

I lean towards her, “What’s it like?”

She groans loudly spinning back on her chair. “A groupie.”

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have bothered you,” I say standing up to leave, “I just figured, immortal vampire, probably has all the time in the world.”

She looks at me out of the corner of her eye. With her foot she slides my bar stool back out. I take my seat and she sighs. “What do you want to know?”

“What’s it like being a vampire?” I say taking a sip from my drink.

She cradles her chin in her hand, “That’s rather broad and ambiguous.”

I think, “How do you become a vampire?”

“A vampire bites you and you don’t die. Next question,” she says, like I’m an idiot. Which I suppose I am, I mean I choose to out a vampire.

“Are you really immoral,” I ask.

“Yes,” she says, “And I really can’t walk in daylight. I do drink blood. I am much stronger and faster than a normal person. But the garlic thing is totally untrue.”

I smile. “What’s it like drinking blood?”

“What do you really want?” she says taking my drink from my hand and smelling it before taking a sip. “You considering the vampire life?”

I roll my shoulders in a shrug. It might be nice to live forever. Was that my intention when I came over? No, of course not, but since she’s thrown it out there.

“Listen,” she says, “I like your moxie, coming over here, and I think I might throw you a bone. Meet me outside that door,” she says pointing, “in ten minutes. Stand nice and far back in the alley out of sight.” 

She stands up and set down my drink. I nervously ask, “Are you going to drink my blood?” 

She smiles, “I’m going to give you an education. I think you’ll find it life altering.”

She disappears into the crowded bar. I look at the door, and at my watch. I slap some money down on the bar and head for the door. Outside is a dark alley, with garbage bags piled high on each side and a big dumpster. I step around the refuse and take up a position far to the back away from the quiet street at the mouth. She might come out here and drain me dry, or she could just be pulling a prank on me and leave me out here to enjoy the lovely aroma. I’m stupid to come out here, if I really think she’s a vampire. What the hell is wrong with me?

The door swings open and two bodies come tumbling out of the bar locked in an embrace. I check my watch, seems early. I step closer to see what’s going on and realize one of the entangled bodies is in fact my vampire. She’s wrapped around a big, linebacker of a man. The man pushes her up against the wall of the alley as his hand finds its way to the bottom of her little black dress. Breathlessly she tells him no, but he doesn’t listen, and his hand continues to migrate up her thigh. More firmly she tells him no, and I take another step towards the now struggling couple. I’m not just going to stand her and watch this gorilla molest this woman. He murmures something against her neck and she pushes him away, firmly shouting no. He laughs and I bite back my own anger. She pushes him hard and he stumbles back. That only seems to make him angry and he raises his hand as if to slap her, at which point my senses jump into high gear as I leap from my hiding place. But in the time it takes me to step out of the shadows she has hold of his wrist and bodily turns him so his back pressed to her. 

“That’s too bad. I did give him a chance,” she looks at me, “You saw it, right? I gave him a chance to make the correct choice. If he had just made the right choice I would have let him just walk away, which is really too bad because he has two kids that are now going to be orphans. Of course he beats the shit out of those kids, but a terrible father is better than no father right? He hit their mother so hard that she lost an eye. That was when she left. She jumped ship like a rat on the Titanic. She abandoned those kids with this monster. Of course it didn;t end any better for her did it? No she died of a drug overdose two years later. And he knows that because she sent him a letter ask, begging for his help. She wanted to come home, because I guess the abuser you know is better than the one you don’t. And you knows she died because the coroner sent him a letter asking him to identify her body, which he never did so she was buried in a pauper's grave with no name. Which is too bad, because he actually does miss her. No one cowers quite right, not the way she did, not even the boy. Hell soon the boy is going to be big enough that he’ll start kicking your ass won’t he? And the girl is just too trusting, you can’t hit her, and she looks so much like her mother and you think if you could just touch her, but no that gets you sent to jail, and once they found out you diddle your own kid they would rape you to death, and no one wants that. So you go out and find those women at the bars, the whores. You know they’re whores, because look at how they dress, they’re asking for you to scare them. If they didn’t want to get hit they wouldn’t dress like whores. Of course they don’t cower like she does, no matter how hard you hit them. So you go out looking for someone that makes you feel as powerful as she did every night, or drink until you’re too drunk to care that they aren’t her when you hit them. Really, leaving you alive would be the real punishment. But, you know, Bitches gotta eat.”

There’s only a second’s hesitation before she rears back and strikes like a snake. The man bucks under her grip, but it’s like a toddler fighting an adult. She squeezes his hand twisting it until it snaps. The man tries to scream but she has his jaw caught in her vice like grip. The sound that comes out is more like a squeal through his teeth. His feet kick against the ground, trying to find traction, but they don’t. And the squealing stops. His hissing breath is sharp and fast through his teeth. Then it’s not. His breath is slow and uneven, and his eyes roll to the back of his skull. For a moment, a long terrible moment, his body goes completely rigid, then he goes limp. Her teeth are still dug into his neck after his body collapses under her and she follows it to the ground. When she has sucked as much as she can stand, or possibly get she unlocks her jaw and licks around the holes in his neck. She doesn’t leave even a drip of blood. Waste not want not, I guess.

When she’s done she sits back on her heels rolling her face to the sky. Her whole body shakes and she drops her face into her hands. “So what do you think, Tim? Is it everything you hoped it would be?”

“Were all those things you said true,” I ask taking a step closer. 

She pulls her hands down her face. Looking like she might be sick she puts the back of her hand under her nose. “Would that make you feel better?”

Shakily she stands, holding the wall for balance. I step around the body to help her. Her head lulls from side to side. She takes a few steps towards the opening of the alley. I look at the dead man on the ground then back to her. “What about him?”

She looks back as if she’s completely forgotten about the body she just made. First she looks at me, then at the body, then at me, and shrugs. I point at him and the openness of the alley. She rolls her eyes, “Oh, right.” Reaching down in a single movement she grabs the neck of the dead man and lifts him like a bag of garbage and throws him into the dumpster. The lid slams closed. “Can we go?”

I stand unable to move for a moment. Then I nod. I step towards her and she leans heavily against me. Her steps are sideways and staggering. “What’s wrong with you?”

“That dude was high as a kite,” she says, giggling, “Honestly if I hadn’t killed him the drugs and booze probably would have.”

“And you’ve got what?” I ask as we stumble out of the alley, “A contact high?”

“You are what you eat,” she laughs.

Cherry's Jubilee

 

            I have to confess, I never thought that ensnaring you would be this easy. As a matter of fact it's almost criminal. One should not fall so willingly into another's trap. I think of your face as we came to the end of our brief affair. How surprised you were. I nearly laughed as your eyes grew wide, and round. You truly had no idea, none what so ever, of my plan. You were so easy. That simple touch pulled you in without question. Ha. When I think of the work I had taken with so many others, it almost seems a shame that you're gone. I have taken women far weaker then you though, you should not feel ashamed. I remember some nearly begging for my eye, oh, but not you. No, you begged for nothing, you demanded. You were truly magnificent that night. You finest wares, rogued face, glittering bangles, you were a vision of beauty. You demanded all eyes that evening. I imagine you always did.

            I never did need to approach you for you came to me. I remember the feel of your skin against my finger tips. So smooth, so warm, so soft. Your lovely long red hair that shined in the light. Your brilliant smile. Your luscious red lips. That look that told all that was in your soul. The world will surely miss your presences in it. I should feel so very guilty, how sad for you that I don't. I can still smell you on my skin. The thought of your last dance still waltzes across my memory. How happy you were, how warm. You were so young, so fresh. You could have had any man, how unfortunate that you chose me. The world will miss you, you young bright thing you. Too bad.

Rumpelstiltskin

            He crept up very slow. It was all in the surprise, if you got that right then everything else was easy. The mood was already sufficiently ominous. A dark and stormy night, she was home alone, the entire neighborhood was silent save for the howling winds, it was perfect. Her silhouette flickered across the living room wall as she sat before the fireplace. Silently he made his way to stand right behind her.

            “You really don’t have to go through all that trouble.”

            He was deflated, “How did you know I was here?”

            “You breathe like a boar and your steps are louder than a cavalry horse on Flag Day.”

            He collapsed onto the ottoman next to her, exasperated. She really took the fun out of everything.

            She was puffing on a cigarette. She didn’t look over at him, just continued to stare intently into the flames. It had been some years since he had last seen her, but she looked so very ragged. It was as though she was worn through in places and the raw nerves were showing. There was such a bitter look on her face, not like the first time he had seen her. Back then she had been young and fresh and desperate. Now she was a withered husk. Had it really been so long?

            “I’ve come to collect what’s mine,” he whispered into her ear.

            “You’re late then,” she said flicking the last of her cigarette into the flames. She shoved herself off the seat and walked out of sight. He quickly jumped up to follow.  

            “I did you a very special service, and now the payment is due…”

            “He died,” she said as she pulled another cigarette out of her pocket, “My first born died.”

            “Pardon?”

            “Rumpelstiltskin, marker of bargains, your prize… your fee… has passed. You made a bad investment, deal with it.”

            She lit up as she leaned against the kitchen sink. Her eyes were drawn out the window and she stayed there transfixed.

            “I’ll have the next then?” he said matter of factly.

            “The next also died, and so did the one after.”

            The little man stared at her curious as she stared dreamily out the window into the black night. Now her terrible transformation seemed less outlandish, to have lost so many children.

            “I did you a great service, and I expect to be repaid.”

            “Yeah, some service,” she sneered as her jaw set harshly.

            He crossed his arms over his chest as he leaned back against the sink next to her. He scoffed at how little his service seemed to mean to her.

            “I plucked you from death’s very hands. I saved your life.”

            She turned to him, her eyes dark with anger. “And let’s take a look at that life shall we? First, you say you’re going to take my first born child. I had no plans to even have children or get married, or any of that so I thought I was safe. But no, not even a week later I meet the man of my dreams. Great, right? Wrong. The first baby was still born not even the first year after we got married. I worked hard to do everything right after that. I wasn’t going to lose another. I treat myself right, I do everything the doctors tell me, does that help? No, lost the second one. After that my husband started blaming me, it was my fault that they died. I was doing something wrong. So for the third one I quite work, I went on a strict regiment, I did everything right, everything. Lost him in the second trimester. After that my husband left me without even the courteously of divorcing me properly before running off with some sweet piece of ass he’d met at work. I couldn’t get my old job back. I have to work part time at a convenience store because that was the only work I could get. I lost the house because I couldn’t keep up with the payments. I’m drowning in debt, I have no husband, I have no children, I have no house, but thank you for saving me and giving me all this. It was really too kind of you. In fact I insist that you take some of it back, it really is too much.”

            He couldn’t help but shrink away from her ire. She oozed hatred for him. And why shouldn’t she? Her life had been terrible since he last saw her. Usually damsels’ lives got better after he made deals with them. Hers only seemed to take a fast train to hell. He thought for a moment.

            “Still… a deal was made my dear and it is time for payment in full.”

            “The deal was for the first born, and he was born dead,” she hissed as she leaned back to the sink.

            He thought a moment longer. There had to be a way to salvage the situation? He stroked his beard as he thought. That was when he took notice of her long luscious figure. Even as old and dried up as she had become she was still a lovely looking woman. He twirled his finger in his well groomed whiskers. A brilliant idea had occurred to him.

            “Still, I never walk away from an investment,” he chided. She faced him ready to wither him with further furry only to find him on bent knee.

            “Madame, I have left you in a poorer state then I found you. Allow me, please, to make amends,” he said extending his hand.

            She stood in shocked silence at first, staring down at his hand as though it were the poised head of a cobra. Then she took another puff from her cigarette.

            Shrugging her shoulders she said, “Fuck it.”

            She placed her hand in his and together they both disappeared out of the dark stormy night to places unknown. The dealer took his prize and the lady took leave of her troubled life.

Love Nip

“Will it hurt?” she asked.

            He sighed. He pulled away and looked her sternly in the eye. She wasn't trying to be difficult, really she wasn't.

            He thought for a moment. “It's like getting a shot. Just little pin pricks.”

            She shivered in mock fear. She really didn't like shots, but that wasn't enough to dissuade her.

            She nodded and took a deep breath. She was ready. He was tired. He just wanted to get this over with.

            He again made his approach. He gently moved away some hair that had fallen on to her neck. He breathed in her fragrant taste. He silently parted his lips. He gently pressed his mouth to the surface of her neck.

            “How will it feel after, when it happens?”

            He pushed away as he threw his hands into the air. “You aren't serious about this. You don't really want it.”

            She shook her head frantically. “No, no, I want it, really. I'm sorry. I'm just nervous.”

            He looked at her from the corner of his eye. She played with a piece of her short hair without looking at him. He sighed again. She was such a tiresome girl.

            “Listen Love, afterwards there will be some pain, but I'll be with you, and we'll be together forever. So what have you got to be worried about?”

            He made his approach again. He pulled her hands to her waist. He paused for a moment expecting some other imbecilic question.

            “Love,” she said in a dreamy far off sort of way.

            He almost laughed at how pathetic she sounded. “Love.”

            He pushed away the hair from her neck. He parted his lips ever so much. He breathed deeply her fresh virgin scent.

            “Love,” she breathed again.

            He smiled to her slender pale neck. Gently he kissed the nape of her neck. Her heart fluttered like a little butterfly in her chest. His smile widened. She was almost too easy. He opened his jaws wider. She did not move, too entranced by love. He licked the skin over the carotid. Still she did not move. He paused for a moment, waiting for terror, or second guessing, but still she did not move.

            His next move was lightning fast. He clamped down upon her neck, sinking in is fangs. She squeaked in surprise and pain. It wasn't like getting a shot, not at all. She wanted very much for him to stop, but he didn't. She told herself, 'soon it'll be time and he'll stop,' but he didn't. She began to panic. She started to try and pull away but every attempt only made his grip tighter. She kept struggling until she had no strength to fight any more. She wanted to get away, but her limbs wouldn't cooperate. She couldn't move at all.

            She started to feel very warm. Everything was fuzzy. Her whole body was numb. Her thoughts floated on a sea of cotton. His bite stopped hurting. The light around her began to blur and sway. Soon she couldn't really see anything at all. She felt very strange. She couldn't really explain it. It was a feeling of complete comfort. She felt warm and safe and comfortable in her sea of fuzz. She started to forget everything, because there was nothing but the fuzziness. She was happy. She didn't really have 'thought' any more. Only fuzziness. She couldn't remember her own name. Just the fuzziness and then the world went black.

"The stroke of death is as a lovers pinch, Which hurts and is dersired" ~Shakespeare